Jink

lying down on the bed,

another restless night

am i better off dead

how can i still fight

those battles I’m losing

the choices I’m choosing

will it settle my mind

will i sleep tonight

bottle of pills in hand

all the doubts are clouding

drift to a better land

my smiles are frowning

nauseous by the facade

time is low on the clock

have no time for pouting

time to make it stop

Chorus:

happy in the light, no one sees the dark

making all the appearances

joking over the seriousness

i can’t lie anymore

i can’t force open the door

asking for help is never my answer

always the advice

but it spreads like cancer

living in denial

living in fear

living in spite

of the loved ones i hold dear

i can’t help the feelings that i have

i can’t help that your help makes me mad

makes me mad

you don’t live through this

you just can’t understand

and now my pain is bliss

from drugs in my hand

should i go and swallow

my poor heart is hollow

is quitting really grand

tonight the pills drop

Chorus

i’ll pray another day

in the morning i’ll wake

there’s still fight left in me

it’s all up to me

one day i’ll become free

maybe it’s not the way

drugs shouldn’t be my escape

tonight i am safe

tonight, i am safe.

i am safe.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255